Trying something new

I'm such a mess right now.

I just got off the phone w/ a "new" therapist, and immediately started bawling my eyes out! What is wrong w/ me? Why is this so traumatic? I hate the thought of starting completely over w/ a new therapist. I hate the fact that I have to rehash so much of my life w/ someone new. It makes me sad because I love what I have w/ my old therapist. I just need to see her so much
right now and I can't. And so this is why I am crying. I really need her right now!

Switching therapists is almost like breaking up w/ a boy and then seeing someone new. You have to start all over again and reintroduce yourself all over again and show them who you really are, all over again. It's such a FUCKING process and I'm kinda tired of it (with the boys), and for some reason it just makes me breakdown and cry. I've worked so well w/ my old therapist and I don't want to leave her. Hell, I don't even want her to know that I've visited someone else, but I just don't know what to do. I feel like I'm cheating on my therapist. Is that even possible? What to do, what to do...

"You've got mental problems man...yah, mental problems man..."